Her marriage was fixed. It was an arranged match, and the boy was from a well-to-do family. She ought to have been happy, but she was miserable and mortified. Nobody tried to acknowledge her persona, her virtues, her wonderful nature. Instead, she was picked on for being overweight.

She smiled through her ordeal, desperately trying to shed weight. Then she got married, had children, and put on weight again. And the stress continued.

I am talking about my college friend. The body-shaming she was subjected to angered me then, and today, as I recall the terrible time she endured, I can still feel the anger simmering.

Why are we so fixated on the shape, size, and form of our bodies? Why is it the dream of most girls to look good rather than be good? Are we collectively responsible for this problem?

The era of appearance-obsession dawned long ago, and its unforgiving spirit has been further stoked by the Age of the Celebrity and the tyranny of social media. Anything that is outside the delusion of photoshopped beauty is up for body shaming. Impossible physical perfection has become the goal. Young girls today airbrush their pictures before putting them on social media. Girls as young as nine years are on diets and in a state of constant conflict with the way they look. More and more young women are opting for cosmetic surgery to look like X or Y celebrities.

Anorexia and Bulimia are on the rise.

This obsession with physical perfection must stop. And we can make this happen. Who is ‘we’? I am talking about every mother and father on this planet. Please teach your daughters (and sons) that the true self is tied to values, abilities, and the power of belief. Not to the shape of the body. Teach them that the true mark of a human being is to do with compassion, empathy, warmth and generosity of mind and heart. Tell them to be confident of who they are because they are unique.

These are simple lessons. They are also transformational. I am doing it with my children, and it is not difficult.

The result of empowering young girls to aim higher than just aspiring for physical attractiveness lasts a lifetime. So does the trauma of being body shamed.

What is it that you want to choose?

The post Shame on those who body-shame you! appeared first on Orgabliss.

We’ve broken it down into four main categories based on how periods affect our mental health after taking all of the preceding into consideration:

Pre-menstrual syndrome, or PMS:

Although the exact causes and triggers of PMS are still unknown, it is possible that many
women’s familiar feelings of depression, anxiety, irritability, and moodiness are caused by
constant fluctuations in estrogen levels during this time.
Be kind to yourself and remind yourself, as well as those around you, that these symptoms are
perfectly normal if you feel a little irritable in the days leading up to your period.

Physiological Signs:

However, mood swings are not the only symptom of PMS. These hormonal changes are
accompanied by numerous physical symptoms that can have a significant impact on a woman’s
mental health.
Women may experience a variety of changes in the weeks and days leading up to their period,
including changes in their sex drive and difficulties sleeping, as well as greasy hair and skin
(which can cause acne). A woman’s mental health, particularly her self-esteem, can be directly
affected by any one of these symptoms.
Even during menstruation, symptoms like nausea, migraines, and dysmenorrhea (period pain)
can be stressful for a woman because they can significantly disrupt her day and routine,
especially if they are severe.

Insatiable cravings:

Many women can agree that period cravings are both a blessing and a curse when it comes to
physical symptoms. We hear it all the time that our bodies are like temples, but what about how
our diet affects our minds?

Inadequate awareness:

Even though women’s health has come a long way over the years, menstrual taboos are still
strong enough to keep many women from talking about their symptoms, especially at work.
Even though sanitary bins are required by law, some workplaces do not provide sufficient waste
disposal for women to change their menstrual products at work. Lack of facilities is a serious
issue that can derail a woman’s regular routine and cause her a great deal of stress, as some
women even fear leaving the house during their period due to heavy menstrual bleeding.
It is comforting to know that you are not alone, as we all experience similar feelings from time to
time. However, we must maintain our resolve and always support one another

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The truth is women have for so long been bombarded with messages on bra glamour that allowing for some logic on bra comfort seems a waste of time. Just look at the glossy, airbrushed photographs of models wearing sexy whispers of lace and satin that turn mammary glands into objects of intense desire. What hope do mundane concepts like bra fit and health have of finding space in that glorified world?

But they must. The fact is, if you are the bra-wearing type, you need to understand a fundamental reality: wearing an ill-fitting bra is not a good idea. What does that mean? It means a bra that does not provide your breasts firm support. Do your breasts need support? It depends on who you ask. Historically, in many cultures, women have resorted to many ways to keep breasts in place. In other cultures, they are unrestricted by cloth or contraption. Medically, many doctors say it’s okay to let your breasts be as nature intended them. Physiologically, breasts, heavy breasts especially, are better off with bra support, say some experts.

Many women will counter the pro-bra lobby to tell you that bras are on the verge of irrelevancy. The pandemic has rewritten freedom rules as we spend more time at home, remote working, unwinding, letting go of old norms. Ditching bras for comfort and ease is among the expressions of that liberation. Many women are finding joy in the unrestricted movement of their bodies, dispensing with the unclasping, and clasping, of hooklets as a daily chore, and so be it. It’s their choice. But what if you want to continue wearing a bra? That’s a choice too.

Wear it for all the right reasons

The symbolism of the bra has always been complex. This undergarment’s origins and evolution are firmly strapped to women’s rights and the ownership of one’s body. More than a century since it appeared, the bra, patented in 1914 by an American socialite Mary Phelps Jacobs, continues to be attacked for its ability to objectify women. But that’s another story.

Right here and now, let’s get back to the matter of bra comfort and fit as essential factors.

1. Comfort is everything: Yes, you read that right. If you want to wear a bra, make sure it fits well. It must not be tight; the straps must not push into your skin. Instead, they must offer support to your shoulders. The cups must cover your breasts gently without squishing them or cutting into them.

2. Wear it and forget it: If you are wearing a bra and chafing and squirming all the time, your skin under the bra itches or hurts, or your back feels like it is being pulled upwards by bra straps, it means it is not a good fit. Ill-fitting bras can lead to neck pain and restrict the chest muscles. If the shoulder straps are tight, your shoulders will get affected. Remember, a good bra must feel like a second skin. 

3. Let it breathe: Sequins, sparkles, and netting? Bras with spangled features make for interesting photographs, but breathable, soft fabric that saves your pores from struggling for air. Spangles and flimsy whims are not on the same page when it comes to comfort and positive support.

4. Ease the load: Do bras help ease the weight of heavy breasts? Most experts will tell you they do. Women with heavy breasts often experience back pain and other discomforts. A well-fitting bra can help ease this problem by supporting the breasts. Talking of heavy breasts, do breasts sag if a bra does not prop them? Some doctors say breast muscle will learn to strengthen if you stop offering it support. But the consensus is a properly fitting bra helps significantly in this matter.

5. Workout wear: While exercising, running, or doing intense sports, a sports bra is just what you need. Breasts are moving parts of the body and will benefit from being given support during a workout to keep the muscles and tissues from excessive strain.

6. Pick the right cup: Breasts come in all shapes and sizes. There is a reason why bras come in different cup sizes and breast sizes too. Know your cup and breast size when you buy a bra. If you need help, consult the store manager. It’s essential to wear the correct cup size so your breasts feel comfortable in it. Wearing the wrong cup size can alter your breast’s natural shape and size and place a strain on the breast tissue.

7. Breast cancer and bras: There is no evidence to suggest that wearing bras causes breast cancer. 

8. Night-time rules: This is one area where the no-bra rule works fine. Tight nightwear, including bras, pyjamas, or shorts, are best left in the closet. Keep your sleep time relaxed by wearing loose, soft, comfortable, breathable clothing. 

So, there you are. When choosing a bra, pick it for the right reasons. Put comfort and health before style. Your body will thank you for it.

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I am referring to the verb ‘empower’.

What exactly does it mean? The dictionary says: ‘To give someone or something the authority or power to do something.’ To me, that implies an external input. In my view, women are innately empowered. It’s an internal process. They have everything it takes to authorize their progress, to give themselves the power to shape their lives.

Every woman is empowered simply because all of us, every one of us, is gifted with qualities, talents, abilities, and possibilities to make a difference in our own lives and the world. We are all rich with accomplishments in waiting.

One of my close friends from college was a bundle of talent. She was intelligent, ambitious, and determined to make a name for herself professionally. She scaled heights in her career, always brimming with confidence. But there was another side to her – as a wife. Her relationship with her husband was rocky. Despite her professional success, she found herself drawn into a spiral of doubts regarding herself.

Her parents could not understand her career ambitions; this was an additional source of friction in her life.

Eventually, she moved to Europe and raised her daughter by herself. Those were tough years for her. Some days, she would cry in despair. Could she persevere? Yes, I would tell her, you can, and you will. I tried to banish her doubts, boost her confidence, reminding her of her strength, determination, and spirit in building a successful career for herself. ‘Look within,’ I would tell her. ‘Everything you need to stride ahead is already there in you. It’s always been there. You just need to rediscover it.’

The strongest of us hit a weak moment sometimes. And that’s alright. At such a time, a helping hand, a motivating thought, a hug, an encouraging pat on the shoulder is like restarting a stalled engine. I call it empowering the empowered. You are reminding them that they have what it takes. It’s to encourage them to reread the chapter on possibilities.

I believe it is essential for each of us to reach out and appreciate the spirit of the women in our lives: mother, sister, relative, friend, colleague, neighbor. Every woman is innately empowered; her unique abilities are proof. She will forge ahead using her potential. But if she falters for a moment or two, just remind her of what she has achieved and never to give up.

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Why? Due to the sense of shame associated with it. Often, women prefer to put up with the discomfort and pain instead of speaking up and seeking treatment. They feel embarrassed to accept that they’re suffering from an infection whose root cause is poor genital hygiene.

While there is a smidgen of truth to that belief, the fact is, an array of reasons causes UTIs.

What are UTIs, and how do we get them?

A UTI is an infection of the urinary system caused by bacteria that enter the bladder through the urinary tract. While bacteria are the most common trigger, there are variants of UTIs caused by fungi and viruses. A UTI can infect any part of your urinary system — from kidneys and ureters to bladder and urethra.

Contrary to popular belief, men contract UTIs too. However, women are more likely to get UTIs because of the female anatomy’s design – bacteria can quickly spread from the vagina and rectum to the urethra, as they’re all located close to each other. This is the primary reason healthcare providers, doctors, and even your mum, keep repeating ‘always wipe from front to back’ after using the loo. Ninety per cent of UTIs are said to be caused by the bacteria called Escherichia coli (E. coli), which is found in abundance in our gut and find their way down to the rectum when you pass stool.

Wiping in the wrong direction isn’t the only cause of UTIs, though. Suppose you use sanitary napkins and tampons for long hours without changing them at regular intervals? In that case, the accumulated blood can also lead to the growth of bacteria and result in UTIs. Bacteria love damp environments.

Sometimes, UTIs are caused by kidney stones, diabetes, pregnancy, birth control such as diaphragms and spermicide, or even a weakened immune system. If your luck of the draw is abysmal, then you could also be genetically predisposed to contracting UTIs.

Symptoms to watch out for

Not one symptom fits all UTIs. Some are tricky to identify. Itching, burning, and pain are the most known symptoms, but you could go around for days experiencing none of these but still have a UTI.

One of the most common symptoms is the frequent need to pee without releasing much urine.

Other symptoms include smelly urine, constant fatigue, fever and chills, urine that’s cloudy or bloody in colour, and lower back pain.

What should you do?

Once one, or a few, of these symptoms, pop up on your radar, visit your gynecologist without delay, as untreated UTIs can lead to kidney infection. Making a pit stop at the nearest supermarket for a bottle of cranberry juice also counts as a delay.

While cranberry juice is leaps more delicious as a treatment option, it has inconclusive results, experts warn. Antibiotics are your best port of call to eliminate the infection for good.

Don’t self-treat or opt for over-the-counter medications either because UTIs come in two variants: cystitis and urethritis. Cystitis is an infection of the bladder, and urethritis is an infection of the urethra. Your doctor best knows what medications can target your specific condition.

Myth or fact?

Is cranberry juice a panacea for UTIs? There’s a grain of truth there, according to some experts. Other common beliefs in nodding distance of fact include the age-old advice to urinate after sex.

Much like wiping your genital area from back to front, sex too can transfer bacteria from other parts of your pelvic region to the urethra. Urinating after sex ensures any errant bacteria that’s wound up in your urethra is expelled and isn’t trapped there to cause further damage.

This doesn’t mean UTIs are the same as sexually transmitted infections. You cannot pass on your UTI to another person. That said, sex can worsen or lead to a UTI.

A UTI is also not a yeast infection, although symptoms sometimes overlap. Yeast infections are fungal and caused by an overgrowth of the fungus Candida in the vagina. They are often accompanied by a smelly curd-like discharge and swelling of the vulva – that’s how you differentiate it from a UTI.

Staying hydrated is another preventative tip passed down generations of women. This advice now has the stamp of medical approval thanks to a recent study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association.

It’s logic: Drinking water makes you frequently urinate, which helps flush out infection-causing bacteria from your bladder before they can set up shop in your body and make you sick.

The more you increase your fluid intake, the better it is for your urinary system. Does gulping down tasteless water constantly sound unpalatable? There’s good news – medical research suggests that acidic fluids do a better job of flushing out bacteria, which means you’re welcome to reach for a bottle of cranberry juice or any other juice to hydrate yourself and prevent UTIs!

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Her marriage was fixed. It was an arranged match, and the boy was from a well-to-do family. She ought to have been happy, but she was miserable and mortified. Nobody tried to acknowledge her persona, her virtues, her wonderful nature. Instead, she was picked on for being overweight.

She smiled through her ordeal, desperately trying to shed weight. Then she got married, had children, and put on weight again. And the stress continued.

I am talking about my college friend. The body-shaming she was subjected to angered me then, and today, as I recall the terrible time she endured, I can still feel the anger simmering.

Why are we so fixated on the shape, size, and form of our bodies? Why is it the dream of most girls to look good rather than be good? Are we collectively responsible for this problem?

The era of appearance-obsession dawned long ago, and its unforgiving spirit has been further stoked by the Age of the Celebrity and the tyranny of social media. Anything that is outside the delusion of photoshopped beauty is up for body shaming. Impossible physical perfection has become the goal. Young girls today airbrush their pictures before putting them on social media. Girls as young as nine years are on diets and in a state of constant conflict with the way they look. More and more young women are opting for cosmetic surgery to look like X or Y celebrities.

Anorexia and Bulimia are on the rise.

This obsession with physical perfection must stop. And we can make this happen. Who is ‘we’? I am talking about every mother and father on this planet. Please teach your daughters (and sons) that the true self is tied to values, abilities, and the power of belief. Not to the shape of the body. Teach them that the true mark of a human being is to do with compassion, empathy, warmth and generosity of mind and heart. Tell them to be confident of who they are because they are unique.

These are simple lessons. They are also transformational. I am doing it with my children, and it is not difficult.

The result of empowering young girls to aim higher than just aspiring for physical attractiveness lasts a lifetime. So does the trauma of being body shamed.

What is it that you want to choose?

The post Shame on those who body-shame you! appeared first on Orgabliss.